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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27751837">Ask Gabriel Anything</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventhe/pseuds/sevdrag'>sevdrag (seventhe)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Ecdyses (The Old Vines universe) [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman &amp; Terry Pratchett</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>"i would date this gabriel and i hate you for it", Gabe: original himbo, Gabriel is a himbo, Gen, Old vines, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, ask Gabriel anything, drunken ask games, gabriel needs a dog, gymbo, just don't ask, wine omens</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 20:48:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,068</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27751837</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/seventhe/pseuds/sevdrag</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel Archer, the Director of Content at Food and Travel Adventures, answers all of your tumblr-submitted questions.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Ecdyses (The Old Vines universe) [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2031409</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>67</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Ecdyses: the Old Vines universe</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Ask Gabriel Anything</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Gabriel had an AMA. It got out of hand. This was amazing. Consider this happening somewhat during Chapter 16 of Old Vines, in the background of the story. In a kind of exaggerated sort of way. </p><p>Thanks as ever to D20Owlbear / Jam for all the documenting and formatting help.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>How have you managed to be so handsome? It should be illegal, sir!</strong>
</p><p>Wow!!!! You certainly aren’t starting out shy!!! Flattery will get you everywhere!!!!! Except that I can’t actually say that, because of my contract, but consider me blushing, anon!!! </p><p>I won’t deny I have a certain <em>appeal</em> to some people, so let me tell you this: it’s all about INNER HEALTH!!! I jog every morning, have a protein smoothie and a salad every day, avoid alcohol (unless it’s part of the job, ha ha ha!), and make sure I’m living my BEST LIFE every day.  I speak nothing but the truth to my team of employees, and I’m sure it makes them respect me EVEN MORE. When you’re LIVING well, you LOOK well. Hey, that’s good! I may have to use that as a tagline somewhere…..!!!!</p><p>[All content published by Gabriel A. Archer during this AMA is the sole property of FTA Inc.]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
<strong></strong></p><p>In your opinion, what's the best Food and Travel Adventures article writer and why? Do you have a favorite of their articles for me to check out?</p><p>
  <strong></strong>
</p><p>WOW!!!! We have SO MANY good writers on our team RIGHT NOW that you need to CHECK OUT IMMEDIATELY!!!! </p><p><strong><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ldioxVEFxo4">Green Living</a></strong> by Tate Lawrence talks about how to stay HEALTHY by eating FRESH and LOCAL. My personal favorite these days !!!!!!!!!!!</p><p><strong><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YddwkMJG1Jo">Sunshine State</a></strong> by Mary Jo Astley is focused entirely on breakfast – THE MOST IMPORTANT MEAL OF THE DAY!!!! Her photography is sublime.</p><p><strong><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m97q218djYU">New Horizons</a></strong> by P. L. Parsons explores a new locale every week – and she actually interviewed ME at that link RIGHT THERE.</p><p><strong><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzbAFL_VSoU">A Taste Of Heaven</a></strong> by A. Z. Fell has to be on the list, with the way his numbers have been SKYROCKETING as he LIVE BLOGS from CALIFORNIA.</p><p>I can’t choose the BEST because ALL of our writers are the VERY BEST!!!!! But these are some of our current stars, and I hope you’ll subscribe to our<strong><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdIeWpu0vB4">update platform</a></strong> to keep track of them!</p><p>[Legal - did I do the links right??????? GAA]</p><p>[for the last time yes - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
<strong></strong></p><p>
  <strong>What's your favorite wine or drink and dinner combo?</strong>
</p><p>Hmmmmm! Well, I have to say, anon, am I eating by myself, or is there a “Plus 1″ involved in this scenario? Ha ha ha. :winkingemoji?:</p><p>Assuming there’s a lovely lady (or gentleman – I’m not picky!) (Yes, I am, I’m incredibly picky, so bring your A Game!!!!!!!)  Anyway. At a special dinner I like to get a plainer wine, so that it will go with everything. The house merlot usually works for me – I really don’t like all of those flavors!!!!!! If we’re talking drinks in general, I’ve found that a delicious finger of scotch is always impressive, as long as you can swallow the taste of dirt and smoke!! They tell me that’s what makes it good? Ha Ha Ha.</p><p>I always pair my drinking with something light to balance out the calories. I’ve recently been liking some of the gourmet stuff coming out from the minimalism trend! Do you know how SATISFYING it is to be served three tenderly cut pieces of steak over a bed of wilted spinach? MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.</p><p>[stop putting ? marks in the emoji - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hello Gabriel! What food do you most prefer to pair with wine?</strong>
</p><p>Well, like I said in my previous ask, I like to have something EXTRA healthy with my wine to balance out all of those calories! (I’m ACTUALLY a LIGHTWEIGHT – Isn’t that funny????????? Director at FTA and I’m a lightweight, ha ha!!)  I think lighter wines are GREAT with a salad of some kind, or with an appetizer or tapas-size serving.  </p><p>I’ve even been to a proper wine tasting (thank A. Z. Fell!!!!!!! He certainly pulled out all the stops!) but I CAN’T IMAGINE eating a fully flavored meal with those glasses of wine he prefers! I’d rather stick to something very light and not that flavorful. I have to keep this body in LINE!!!!!</p><p>(PS: look for YOURS TRULY in an upcoming chapter of A. Z. Fell’s NEW BOOK based on his time in WINE COUNTRY! I made sure to take some time off to spend an ENTIRE DAY with a STELLAR BLOGGER from FTA!!!!! I’ll certainly be in the book, I’m sure of it!!!!!! Fell and I are BEST FRIENDS!!!!!!!)</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hi Gabriel!!!!!! I'm your biggest fan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I just wanted to find out what do you do to stay so positive all the time?????????????? CHEERS!!!!</strong>
</p><p>Hello!!!!!!!!! I guarantee I’m your biggest fan TOO!!!!!!!! You have ENTHUSIASM and I LIKE that in an anonymous internet ask!!!!!</p><p>It’s all about INNER HEALTH, my friend. EMBRACE YOURSELF and then do everything you can to live up to your own POTENTIAL! Why waste time being down about ANYTHING when you can instead work on bringing OTHER PEOPLE UP????????</p><p>Once you’ve embraced your inner health it’s time to share it with the world! I always look at my employees and think: Where do they need a little PUSH in order to be their BETTER SELVES??? I find that helping others also helps my INNER HEALTH so much!</p><p>Oh, and try kale smoothies!!!!! I can’t EVER be ANGRY in the morning if I have a KALE SMOOTHIE!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, thoughts on cheese?</strong>
</p><p>Cheese!!!!!</p><p>I enjoy cheese very much, but must be careful with it, because I wouldn’t want my cholesterol to get angry with me!!!! I think it’s BEST as a topping on something HEALTHY. There’s nothing like fresh grated parmesan cheese on a giant salad with tomatoes!! Or a bit of cheddar cheese on top of my boiled chicken!!!!! Or maybe a slice of gouda melted over avocado and egg white on a gluten-free bagel. Anon, have YOU ever had a gluten-free bagel? MIND-BLOWING!!!!!!!</p><p>I’ve also been told it’s VERY GOOD with wine, but I’m not the connoisseur of wine you want to be looking at. Check out<a href="https://twitter.com/michaelsheen">A Taste Of Heaven</a> here to see what our EXPERT A. Z. Fell recommends!!!! </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Mr. Archer, some of my employees’ productivity has not been quite up to par the past few months. They say the pandemic has thrown their lives into chaos, but I feel it’s important that employees keep work and home separate. How do you fire underperformers while boosting morale of others?</strong>
</p><p>Wow! An actual management question!! You’ve come to the right place, anon!!!</p><p>FIRST it’s INCREDIBLY important to make sure you’re motivating all of your employees! Keep in mind that motivation isn’t just complimenting what they do well! It’s also about encouraging them to improve!!! I’ve bought my employees memberships to gyms, expensive sneakers, fruit baskets, scarves, AND motivational posters for their OWN homes. It’s about giving back!!!!</p><p>SECOND when you have underperformers, it’s important to remember what HR says: “You can’t fire someone without a reason!” Ha Ha Ha! And while some states have “At Will Employment,” remember that it’s YOUR job to PROTECT your company from potential LAWSUITS!!!! SO give that employee an improvement plan, and watch them CAREFULLY. If they really want the job, they’ll try EXTRA HARD to impress you!!!!!! I’ve seen it happen!!! If not, well, those plans work their way right into termination reaaaalalllllllly easily, anon!!</p><p>THIRD, I KNOW times are tough now. This pandemic has messed with SO MANY businesses! Even FTA has had to adjust our ways of doing business to stay competitive! Just remember: <strong>YOU ARE THE BOSS!!!!!!!! Y</strong>our employees NEED that kind of guidance in these trying times!!! </p><p>[Legal - can I say that? GAA]</p><p>[i dont een know what to do w this - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel! Have you ever considered a career as a clown?????</strong>
</p><p>Anon!!!! Ha Ha Ha!!!! This is the funniest ask I have gotten all evening!!!!!!!!!</p><p>I have to say, I have not!!! I do consider myself a funny guy, at times, so I have that down pat! But a clown? Imagine what that makeup would do to my pores!!!!!!</p><p>[anon - email me for an FTA discount ilu - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel!!!!!!!!!!!! Any chance for even more content from A. Z. Fell?????????</strong>
</p><p>Hello anon!!!! You’re very enthusiastic as well!!!!!!</p><p>I’m happy to tell you all that A. Z. Fell is working on a VERY SPECIAL book right now that we expect to have out to you JUST IN TIME for the holidays!!!!! There have been a few bumps in the road - ha ha, nobody’s perfect! Except me! - but I have the UTMOST confidence that his book on wine and food in California’s lovely wine country will be ABSOLUTELY delightful!</p><p>I hope you’re all enjoying the entries he’s been putting out as well!! I have heard through the “grapevine” that he is getting INSIDER information from a vineyard owner who’s walking him through ALL of the steps there are in making wines!!!! Even ***~*~**I**~*~*** didn’t know many of the things Fell is writing about now! It’s so exciting to see! I’m so happy he has been able to tempt this winery owner into sharing his SECRETS with our FTA audience!!!!!</p><p>[i dont even know what to do with that - eric]</p><p>[leave it; most web browsers will vanish it all anyway - michael]</p><p>[ok - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>what's ur opinion on the current state of the world king. what are the predictions</strong>
</p><p>My opinion is ALWAYS that things are going EXCELLENTLY, anon!!!!!</p><p>It seems like a bit of a rough time, but look on the BRIGHT SIDE, always!</p><p>This coronavirus is terrible, but it’s encouraging people to WASH HANDS and LIVE HEALTHIER! We’ve all had to find INNER STRENGTH during this pandemic! We will come out STRONGER!</p><p>Politics is a mess, but SO MANY PEOPLE voted! That’s a HUGE step for America!!!!!!!</p><p>Global warming is a DISASTER! but MORE PEOPLE know about it than EVER BEFORE!</p><p>And in all the chaos MY personal life remains DECENTLY GOOD, and if I can do it with all of these emails in my Inbox, so can you! Ha Ha Ha.</p><p>Just stay POSITIVE as much as you can, anon! Our world is better than ever!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel! What's your opinion on memes? Any favorites?</strong>
</p><p>So! I had Legal google “Memes” for me so that I could make sure I was answering this correctly, and I am!!!!</p><p>I HAVE to say that my FAVORITE MEME EVER is the one and only business cat!!!!!!!!!! just LOOK at how FUNNY he is!!!!! And the TIE!!!!!!!</p>
<p></p><div class="center">
  <p>
    
  </p>
</div><hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>what's ur zodiac sign king</strong>
</p><p>Oh, anon, do you really have to ask???? I am of course <strong>A LEO~~~!!!!!!!!</strong> The LION KING of the ZODIAC!!!!!! I am BOLD and DARING and so VERY CONFIDENT. It’s exciting !!!!!!</p><p>Not that I really BELIEVE in all of that stuff, but honestly, when I went to meet A. Z. Fell for a day, there was a lovely lady who did my horoscope and my tarot cards. We don’t need to talk about the reading, honestly, but she said she’d never seen a truer Leo!!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>GABE! My buddy, man of the hour!! My sister is *very* into you and she's too shy to ask you out herself yanno? And I'm not gonna do it for her cause that's a COWARD MOVE!! BUt!! I wanted to ask, how should she woo you? AKA what ammo can i give her to help her get up her nerve to ask you out? - Sincerely A Bro</strong>
</p><p>WOW~!!!!</p><p>Dear A Bro,</p><p>I am incredibly flattered!!!! You must like your sister very much to reach out like this!!! I have nothing but RESPECT for this ENTIRE evening of asks! I haven’t felt this loved since the last Monday staff meeting!!!!!</p><p>I AM quite a prize but I don’t know why people are shy about approaching me????? I TRY not to be intimidating????  Maybe I just AM intimidating because I come across as so amazing, but I PROMISe I’m a normal human like everyone else!!!!</p><p>Hmmm, A Bro, what am I into? It’s a bit cheeky to talk about this on the Tumblr, but honestly, I did say Ask Me Anything, and you have!</p><p>When it comes to women, I like a lady who takes care of herself. I don’t mean fancy hair and makeup – I mean a woman who TAKES CARE of herself, inside and out!!!! I once dated a lady who ran faster than I did, and wow, that was a turn-on! Any woman that could bench-press me gets my number immediately!!!!!! Can she beat me at number of crunches in a minute? I’ll ask her out this second. Can she punch me in the face so hard it bruises???? I’ll propose on the SPOT. It isn’t NECESSARY, of course, but you asked!!!!!</p><p>For first dates, I LOVE to go somewhere fancy yet casual. I have a GREAT wardrobe, if I do say myself, so I REALLY like the chance to show it off!! But I also prefer the simpler things when it comes to food. So anyone who suggests a dinner at a place like that, well, I’m a goner!!!</p><p>I also love a lady who will choose a drink for me. I’m such a lightweight that after one drink everything tastes good, so to have a partner who will pick delicious things for me is SO HELPFUL.</p><p>I hope that helps!!!!! If you can convince your sister not to be too shy, I’d love to get an ask from her, even if it’s anonymous!!!!!!!! Thanks, A Bro!!!!!!</p><p>[what - eric]</p><p>[leave it. page views are off the charts and he doesn’t have any dignity to spare anyway - michael]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Whats your take on coffee?</strong>
</p><p>Coffee! Wow, anon, one of my favorite things to talk about!!!!</p><p>So, I admit - weakness coming up, people, I TOLD you I wasn’t PERFECT! - I absolutely love coffee! Maybe the caffeine isn’t entirely great for your body, but it’s great for your INNER HEALTH, let’s be honest!!!</p><p>A fresh cup of black coffee in the morning gets me like nothing else! I get up early, have my coffee, and run a loop around the block in my neighborhood. Between the hour, the running, and the coffee, this is PERFECT TIMING for me to stop back home and, well, <em>eliminate some toxins</em> if you know what I mean!!!! I can then do three more loops before I come back, shower, and have another cup in my travel mug on the way to the office. </p><p>The thing with coffee is that it has to be balanced with other things or it can be TOO MUCH for a delicate stomach! I like having a GLUTEN FREE BAGEL in the mornings with my coffee, maybe alongside a smoothie packed with antioxidants and protein to get me GOING during the MOST important meal of the day. </p><p>The thing about INNER HEALTH is: that taste of coffee gets me READY to GO like nothing else! I’m buzzing, I’m watching, my hands are SHAKING I’m so excited! Some days I have nothing except coffee until 4:00pm, and all I have to say in that case is, WATCH OUT, WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p><p>[Legal note: health advice from G. A. Archer is not specifically recommended by FTA Inc]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel!!! Any chances for a new book from you??</strong>
</p><p>Hello!!!! You must be a fan of my previously published works,<a href="https://www.amazon.com/s?k=chicken+soup+for+the+soul+puppy&amp;crid=1P5Z4ULMXS78I">Working With Your Inner Strength</a> and <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Sh-Giggles-Ultimate-Bathroom-Joke/dp/1250164109/ref=sr_1_3">Inner Health Vs Outer World</a>!!!!!! Are you Houdini??????? Because you’re right on the money!!!!! Agnes Nutter couldn’t have predicted it any better!!!!!!</p><p>My THIRD book, titled <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KVqDWGKb8k">Smiling In A World Of Frowns</a>, is currently in the works! I’m working with our BEST editor EVER, Michael Rosa, to bring you a NEW MOTIVATIONAL story by YOURS TRULY about how to stay more and more positive in a world that’s just DETERMINED to bring you down!</p><p>I can’t WAIT to release a snippet for all of my fans!!!!</p><p>[note - we know that isnt what hodini did plz stop sending emails - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hey Gabe! (I can call you Gabe, can‘t I?) Would you be so kind to tell us a bit about how you came to be the person you are today? What drew you towards a project as Food and Travel Adventures? Are you also interested in food and travel yourself, and what are your favourites (meals, drinks, places to be)? What is it that you have that others don’t that makes you unique for your position? A lot of questions, I know, I‘m just such a big fan of your network!</strong>
</p><p>WOW!!! This is SUCH an amazing question!!! How intimate! I had no idea my fans wanted to get to know me this badly!!!!!</p><p>And while normally you can only call me Gabe if you’re <strike>naughty</strike> [legal note- i shuld delete this but dont care - eric], I’ll allow it for this ask!!</p><p>I grew up as the biggest boy in my class! And while you might think that was a great place to be, it was HARD for a child!!! All of the girls wanted me as their partner for square dancing!! Guys all wanted me on their basketball team!! And I was just trying to be FAIR to everyone, because EVERYBODY deserves a piece of this, no matter who they are!!! My life growing up was VERY busy!</p><p>I of <strong>course</strong> got  a business degree from Harvard with an MBA from UCLA and my work was recognized by one of my favorite professors, G. O. Dessa, who referred me to an internship that then led to an introduction to FTA. Once I was there I recognized the UNIQUE situation they’re in, one that could lead to MAJOR DOMINATION of a bunch of different markets, and I guess they liked what I was saying, anon~~~~~!</p><p>I mean, I’m interested in food and travel in that I watch a bunch of our shows in the evenings, but I also recognize that MY strengths are elsewhere. I admire the CAST of EMPLOYEES we have put together to create content! I’m a thinker, NOT a do-er! I could never be happy doing that kind of work. But I REALLY respect our team, even with all of their weaknesses! They’re doing a GREAT job!</p><p>I don’t know, I hope this answered all of your questions, anon!!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hello Gabriel, tell us more about your coworkers!</strong>
</p><p>ANON!!!!!!!!!!!! I really do have the BEST team of coworkers ANYWHERE!</p><p>[Legal, am I allowed to answer this? - GAA]</p><p>[go for it - eric]</p><p>[AWESOME!!!!! - GAA]</p><p>SO my FIRST and BEST coworker is Michael Rosa. Michael is a BASTARD but in the BEST way?????? She understands what people are tying to say and just kind of tidies up their words like a NANNY (Michael, I hope you know this is complimentary!!!!!!) until what they’re saying is so clear and LOVELY. And even though Michael and I disagree sometimes - A LOT OF TIMES - she still has WONDERFUL statistics with regards to bringing new projects into FTA, and I absolutely RESPECT that!!!!</p><p>John Sandalphon is one of our editors, and let me tell you, he can be as BRUTAL as a BOMB!!!!! (Hey, John, it’s all cool, let’s play tennis soon!!!!!) Mr. Sandalphon can be dropped onto any kind of unedited work and once the EXPLOSION settles, grammar and spelling will be corrected to the point where the National Guard wouldn’t have a complaint!</p><p>Mona Uriel is another editor and let me tell you that she is here for STYLE. Ms. Uriel knows when to add an image, or a hyperlink, or a graphic; she knows exactly how to tag and archive a blog entry to pull every last click out of it. She is a MASTER of the art!!!!!!</p><p>I have SO MANY other co-workers that I LOVE but I can’t do them all justice, anon! </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
cinnabarmint asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hello Gabriel! I'm curious, what do you think of Mr. Dowling. BTW, I'm a huge fan of A Z and his blog.</strong>
</p><p>[Legal - can I answer this? - GAA]</p><p>[i give 0 fucks anymore - eric]</p><p>[Legal - do I have to answer this? - GAA]</p><p>[hold on - eric]</p><p>[gabr wants out of this 1 what do we do (link) - eric]</p><p>[make him answer, this is v important for our image - michael]</p><p>[done - eric]</p><p>[u hav 2 answer it - eric]</p><p>[are you sure this isn’t against our regulations????????? - GAA]</p><p>[just do it u knob ur fine - eric]</p><p>[please DESIST calling me that it was ALL a MISUNDERSTANDING - GAA]</p><p>[wev jsut answer it - eric]</p><p>Mr. Warlock Dowling is, of course, a tremendously respected independent agent working with FTA. We do acknowledge his relationships with our United States Ambassador to England, Sir Thaddeus Dowling, and his wife Harriet Dowling who has contributed so much to pro-choice organizations world-wide.</p><p>[Can I say THAT??? Please cancel this article if you need to. -GAA]</p><p>[thats fact gabe u can say all the facts u want - eric]</p><p>[Fuck. -GAA]</p><p>Mr. Dowling is incredibly shrewd and must spend the bulk of his time looking for loopholes, an insinuation I do not make lightly, but with a handful of information to back me up. I would note that most agents in his position normally focus on a relevant and reliable increase in PROFIT for both parties, but Mr. Dowling continues to focus on issues outside of the bottom line, which make me think that those parties he may represent within this company may want to look for alternate representation.</p><p>Regardless of Mr. Dowling’s takes on the way we do business, I’m so glad to hear you’re a fan of A. Z. Fell’s blog!!!! There sure are a lot of you out here tonight, and I SO appreciate every offer of support you’ve given us so far!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>are you home of phobic be honest</strong>
</p><p>Anon, I had to google this!!!!!!</p><p><a href="https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=home-o-phobic">https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=home-o-phobic</a> this is the FIRST result I found and I can ASSURE you I am NOT – I have a LOVELY home on the outskirts of LA with a pool, a hot tub, a spa, a LOVELY home gym in the basement, and a number of rooms with only the finest of furnishings. I have no issue with owning a home! Mine is amazing!!</p><p>After this response and a lot of searching (THANKS, ERIC!!!!!!!) I realized that this might be an insinuation of homophobia, to which I have to say: I am not at ALL homophobic! I love many homos! In fact, I have INDIVIDUALLY loved many homos! They’re lovely people and I wish them all the best upon achieving their rights!</p><p>[im done here - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>I am getting second hand stress from Gabriel's liberal use of exclamation marks (!!!)</strong>
</p><p>Anon!!!!! My use of exclamation marks is a MESSAGE of the JOY I have to bring to ALL of YOU!!!!!  Do not be afraid!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Eric, what's your email? Asking for that discount</strong>
</p><p>Look, Eric, there’s an ask just for you! Isn’t that curious!!!</p><p>msg:fwd garcher@fta.com turnover turn.down replaceable.eric@fta.int.org stage=hidden space?new sheen/prodigal/michael.exe</p><p>&gt; well i guess gabe has passed this on to me and i might get fired but </p><p>&gt; anons u have given me so much entertainment</p><p>&gt; u can hit me at replaceable.eric@fta.int.org but the email changes daily cause IT is a bunch of fux so if u dont get a response email eric1997@gmail.com and ill hook u up</p><p>&gt; please continue to shame this man im having the time of my life</p><p>[Legal, please let this message stand. Contact me with questions. - Michael Rosa]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Dear Gabriel, how do you manage success so, well, successfully?</strong>
</p><p>Well then! Buckle UP, drakes and ducks, because I am about to give you some Grade A, top notch, A Game advice!!!</p><p>The best way to manage success is to be READY for success. And this can be really hard for lots of people!!! But!! If you wake up in the morning, drink your sharp black cup of coffee, and tell yourself you are OPEN to the WINS the world can bring you today, you’ll find your mind is ready for it!</p><p>I’ve also been here for a while, anon!!!!!  I’ve learnt a lot of tricks on how to evaluate your losses and spin them positive!!! You just have to learn to look at it from the COMPANY’S point of view, because so many transactions end up negative for individuals, but the company you’re working with might get a BIG win!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Mister Gabriel, are you sure you don't want to pursue the clown career path? I find your sense of humor to be impeccable and I'd be delighted to witness more of it!</strong>
</p><p>Anon!!!! I’m so glad you find me funny!!!!!! I have two published books where you can read more about my work - just scroll back!! - if you want to get even more of my sense of humor!!!</p><p>I’m still not sure a clown’s career is right for me, but I’m TICKLED that you find me funny enough to suggest it!!! Thank you!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hi Mr. G! Any advice you can give us to stay for during quarantine?</strong>
</p><p>OH!!!! I ABSOLUTELY can!!!!</p><p>So, quarantine is difficult. And we should all acknowledge that. But you should also recognize that this is a BATTLE that NO ONE ELSE has EVER had to fight before!!!! Do you know what that makes you, anon???? A WARRIOR.</p><p>This isn’t a time to think about what you’ve lost. All of us have GAINED things too!!! And maybe the losses seem to be bigger, but that’s up to YOUR BRAIN to balance!!!!!!!!! You have time at home! Not driving your car so much! You can relax in pajamas! You can have a date over Zoom! Look, there are ENDLESS opportunities, if you can just reset your perspective! </p><p>Quarantine is a force telling us NO. And in a lot of ways it’s right!!! If you care at ALL about sullying the TEMPLE of your CELESTIAL body, you’ll do best to stay at home and PROTECT IT! The key, Anon, is turning quarantine into a force that tells you YES!!!!!!!!! </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hello Gabriel. What's your favourite cute video?</strong>
</p><p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5te2RbxO_1k">THIS ONE</a>!!!!!!!!!</p><p>Look how CUTE they are!!!!! all the PUNCHING and the SMILES?????????</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
cinnabarmint asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>please recommend us a champion breakfast.</strong>
</p><p>THANK YOU for this ASK, my friend, I am SO HAPPY to share my CHAMPION morning routine with you!!!!!</p><p>Wake up at a GOOD hour! I get up at 6am in LA because it makes me HAPPY!</p><p>Do your morning washes and stretches, and then have a cup of black coffee and go out for the first loop of your morning run.</p><p>Deal with the, well, results from your morning run and coffee.</p><p>Perform the rest of your morning run, take a BRISK lukewarm shower to open up all of your pores, and then get dressed!</p><p>Drink the rest of your coffee while you make the following: one (1) gluten-free bagel; one (1) egg, scrambled or fried, possibly egg whites only; one (a) slice of cheese; a few (2??) pieces of avocado; an (1) slice of tomato, salted to taste. Stack ingredients to build the ULTIMATE breakfast sandwich!!!!!!!!</p><p>Make a protein shake also if the rest of your day looks as if it won’t allow you to get enough raw protein in before dinner.</p><p>Drive to work, enjoying that AMAZING ENERGY SANDWICH while on the road! Do NOT let cheese or tomato drip onto your pants. It is terrible.</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>what happened that one time you were given a tarot reading 👀</strong>
</p><p>Well! Anon out here being bold!!!!! I guess I might as WELL tell you about it!</p><p>So I spent a day with A. Z Fell while he was doing research for his book (just wait !!!!! It’s going to be great, an entire chapter reflecting our adventures!!!!!), and while he said the winery he had been working with was closed, we ran into a SPLENDID couple at another winery while we were out doing a tasting! (Very rogue, me! An entire day tasting wine! Needless to say, I ran 13.1 miles the next morning!!!!!!!)</p><p>This couple was somehow related to the LOVELY, LUXURY home I’d rented for Fell when he came out to California wine country to do this study – we spare NO expense for our internal artists!!!!  I’m not quite sure how - ask the people at Purchasing if you want the details - but there was a very charming woman who offered to read my tarot cards to me if we bought her a glass of wine. Seeing as we spare NO expense, I immediately bought both her and her grumpy Scottish husband another round. At this point, Fell had gone off to make a call, and I was left to entertain myself!!!!!!!!</p><p>Between my shuffling and hers, we ended up with three cards, and this is what she said:</p><p>The Five of Wands was my first card and she said it was a lot about conflict and ambition in my past and she was SO RIGHT????? my past is FULL of ambition, and I’ve had to FIGHT for my ideas against others, but it made sense? </p><p>The card for the “present” was the Knave of Swords and she said that was my being PASSIONATE and ENERGETIC about NEW IDEAS but i had to be sure I wasn’t cutting them off at the root????? I told her I was the Director of new ideas!! And she just laughed for five minutes so it must have been a good thing???????</p><p>The final card was the Lightning-Struck Tower. I’ll admit, fans, this card was scary!!!! She told me the reading represented loss, a big loss, and when I asked if she meant financially she just laughed again so I think so!!!!!!! She said it meant the end and destruction of an old world and something new but wouldn’t answer any of my questions about it!!!!! Obviously she was just looking for a tip!!!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>hello gabe! how do you feel about a person named beelzebub? i think you would like them a lot :) also, wanted to say i am your biggest fan!</strong>
</p><p>I don’t actually think I know anyone named Beelzebub?</p><p>[Support - search my contacts? GAA]</p><p>[bro thats a made up fkn name ok - eric]</p><p>Is this the person who seems to be gathering information about me for dating purposes??? I encourage you to leave me your real name so that I might engage with you directly!</p><p>Also, thank you so much!!! This entire experience has given me SUCH an appreciation for my fans!!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>If someone made you choose a musical, on tv or broadway, what would you say your favorite was?</strong>
</p><p>Oh, anon!!!!!!</p><p>Men in my position aren’t supposed to admit their love for musicals and sung works, but I must confess – I have a deep appreciation for the musical arts!!!!</p><p>You might think be simple, but my favorite of all time is, of course, The Sound Of Music. What’s more classic???????? What’s more dramatic????? Find me a date that will watch it with me and I’m smitten!!!!!</p><p>I’ve also been to see “Cats” on Broadway, and while I found it VERY confusing, I have heard there was a movie remake attempting to capture its message? Perhaps another good date theme?</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel!!!! Any movie recommendations to start my evening RIGHT??!</strong>
</p><p>YES!!!!!! I LOVE dramatic movies, anon!!!!! They truly make me feel AMAZINg!!!!!!</p><p>Star Wars: People occasionally mock me, but where else can you see such STRONG and STELLAR messages about LEADERSHIP???????</p><p>Rudy: SUCH A GREAT MESSAGE TO EVERYONE ON THIS PLANET!!!!!!!!!</p><p>Pacific Rim: Sometimes  you need GREAT STRENGTH to beat off GREAT EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!</p><p>Hot Tub Time Machine: LOOK I laughed A Lot!!!!!!!</p><p>[note the views expressed in this post do not reflect the views of FTA and i’m far too fucking tired 4 this - eric]</p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>[friends the system is about to shut down and reboot to install updates overnight - eric]</strong>
</p><p>[i dont think weve ever had such a ginormous response to something like this - eric]</p><p>[how the fuk is it gabriel that yall find so interesting i dont get it - eric]</p><p>[either way u can keep submitting asks but u have to give the network 12 hours or so to update and reboot before u get new answers okay? - eric]</p><p>[!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!! IM GABRIEL !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - eric]</p><p>[see u all tomorrow aunt michael dont fire me - eric]</p><p>– – – – – </p><p>[we’ll be booting back up in a few hours - eric]</p><p>[i hate my job - eric]</p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>My FRIENDS!!!!! I have RETURNED to answer ALL of your QUERIES today and tonight!!!!!!!</strong>
</p><p>Eric says I need to proceed at a much slower rate! I guess I was TOO EXCITED last night in sharing my thoughts!!! I think I answered 30 MAGNIFICENT QUESTIONS????????? How ASTOUNDING!!!!</p><p>Anyway, I am BACK AT IT, so please feel free to continue <a href="https://sevdrag.tumblr.com/ask">ASKING ME THINGS!!!</a></p><p>Yours Truly, </p><p>Gabriel A. Archer</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>HEY!!! It's A Bro again! I told my sister I asked you about this and she almost MURDERED me ahaha!!! Gotta love that sibling love! It's amazing!!! Anyway! I'm also hiding in the basement and typing this before she can break down the door in embarrassment! She wants to know if you're down for coffee break, taking a walk to watch the SUNRISE!!, and then diner food for a date!!</strong>
</p><p>WOW! Good MORNING, A Bro!!!!!! I’m just <strong>delighted </strong>to hear from you!!!!!</p><p>I’m very glad you and your sister have talked?????? I’m so intrigued!!!!! Who would have thought this “ask” situation would have led to <strong>this</strong>?????? NOT <em>ME</em>!!!</p><p>I might have a few questions for your sister, then!!!! Does she also enjoy getting up EARLY to get a GREAT START on the day???? How does she take her coffee???? Does she also enjoy salads with no dressing????? We might be <em><strong>SOULMATES</strong></em>?????</p><p>[gabr has learnd how to bold and italics im sry yall save yr souls now - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>do you have any thoughts on religion? Or spirituality?</strong>
</p><p>ANON!!!!! We really are getting PERSONAL about my own INNER HEALTH now!!!! <strong>Thank you</strong> for <em>asking</em>???</p><p>I was brought up VERY STRICTLY <strong>CATHOLIC</strong>!!!! It really is the BEST religion!! We grew up knowing it was the one TRUE way to be. With so many RULES to follow!! How convenient!!!</p><p>But I have to confess, dear anon, that I don’t find very much time to be <em>religious </em>anymore in this very busy life I lead now!!!!!!! I would say I am <strong>SPIRITUAL</strong>, though, because I dedicate SO much time to my INNER HEALTH and to improving the INNER HEALTH of my employees! It’s more than a lif<em>estyle</em>, it’s a <strong>belief</strong>!!!!! We just have to keep working to be the BEST version of OURSELVES and what more could a G-d ever want?!?!???!??!!??!..?!?!? </p><p>[Legal note: opinions expressed by G. A. Archer are not necessarily endorsed by FTA Inc] </p><p>[thank fuk - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hello Mr. Archer, big fan here. I'm hearing that there will soon be a new book by AZ Fell and FTA (and that you'll be a part of it. How exciting!!!!).</strong>
</p><p>On the one hand a very light read would be super nice. On the other hand, maybe something a bit more fleshed out and personal might be the ticket. I just can't decide which I'd like best!!!</p><p>Could you tell us what kind of book we can expect? No spoilers, obvs. :P</p><p>Have a gorgeous day!!!</p><p>My friend!!! If you enjoy <a href="https://www.franzia.com/">A Taste of Heaven</a> you’re going to <strong>AD O R E</strong> what Fell has coming for us!! It’s so much MORE that’s J<strong>UST LIK<em>E HIS FANT</em>ASTIC BLOG!!!</strong>! A happy light read for all of the wine and food lovers inside ALL of us!!!!</p><p>(and you SAID no SPOILERs but guess what, there will be an ENTIRE chapter featuring YOURS TRULY as Fell and I explore the wonders of Wine COuntry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m so excited I can’t type ?!??)</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, do you like Mexican food?</strong>
</p><p>I LOOOOVE Mexican food, but it does not love me back!! OH BOY. IT DOES NOT!!!! </p><p>I do enjoy a good, simple taco sometimes. When you make them FRESH, with lots of lettuce and tomatoes, they can HIT the SPOT!!!!!!</p><p>[im not saying it - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel - cats or dogs? Vinyl, CD or music files? When was the last time you cried?</strong>
</p><p>Hi anon!!!</p><p>Dogs, because what’s better than a DEVOTED PET that will do everything you ask it to and just wants to eat food and be loved???? N OTHING!!!! I have nothing against cats though!!!!  A lot of men somehow view cats as the enemy but I am here to say that this cis bi man is masculine enough to like cats just fine!!!! I would just rather have a DOG that I could TAKE FOR RUNS??? It’s like a workout partner, only furry!!!</p><p>Music files, anon, definitely – my life doesn’t have room for that CLUTTER and it all needs to be TRANSPORTABLE. I need to be able to take Climb Every Mountain with me wherever I go!!!! Gotta get that MOTIVATION!!!</p><p>I haven’t cried in a long while, anon, but I think it was during my last rewatch of The Sound Of Music!!! It just gets me SO GOOD!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, how does it feel like being an A grade All-American stud?</strong>
</p><p>WOW, anon!!!! I am FLATTERED!!!! </p><p><strong>A-grade</strong> is one of my favorite terms, too! Wow! An A Grade All-American stud???? Can I put that on my business cards???? I’m actually blushing, anon!!!! I would send you a photo if I knew how to post one!!!!!</p><p>[Michael - can I put that on my business cards????? - GAA]</p><p>[no - m]</p><p>How does it feel, though?? Most days it feels AMAZING!!! It’s GREAT to know your SELF WORTH, anon!!! Once you get to the point where you can look at yourself naked in the mirror EVERY MORNING after your COFFEE and your RUN and your SHOWER and say, gee, that’s a fine piece of A Grade All American stud??!!!!! That’s when you know your INNER HEALTH is reflected in your OUTER health!!!!!</p><p>Gee!! Golly!! This “ask” game has been so enlightening!!!</p><p>[this anon can email me for a free ass kcikikng in the dennys parking lot how dare u - eric]</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
cinnabarmint asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Dear Gabriel, if you could have chosen any other career part, what would it have been?</strong>
</p><p>Wow, anon, I’m really not sure!!!</p><p>I do LOVE being in CHARGE of things, so I think I would have gone into management anyway! I LOVE getting to tell people what to do in order to help their OWN careers and their own SELVES!!!  </p><p>I wonder if I could have been a motivational speaker? I LOVE talking!!! And I love being enthusiastic!!! Maybe I can still be one, though!! </p><p>Ha Ha Ha – I bet that other anon is wishing I would say A CLOWN!!!!!!!!! Well, like I said, I AM SO FUNNY, so maybe a comedian as well!!!!!  </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Mr. Gabriel, can you please offer some advice for my first job interview? I'm super nervous.</strong>
</p><p>Anon there is NO reason to be NERVOUS!!!!! Job interviews are all about CONFIDENCE!! So start building your confidence NOW!!!!!!!@!! </p><p>First: Walk in there like you OWN the place and you are ALREADY the boss!!! Bring your A GAME ATTITUDE to the door!!!! Let them know that you are a WINNER who is READY to GO!!!!!</p><p>Second, which should actually be first I guess: make sure you are at the PEAK of your INNER HEALTH before going in!!!!! Be sure to eat healthy for a day or two beforehand, get your exercise, and have GOOD SLEEP the night before!!! Eat a BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS before you go!! Have some coffee …… and save the rest of it for a reward after you KNOCK IT OUT OF THE PARK????!</p><p>3rd - Remember that the interview goes BOTH WAYS. They aren’t just interviewing YOU – YOU’RE interviewing THEM!!! Is this company GOOD ENOUGH to deserve your VERY BEST every day, day in and day out? Are they WORTHY of your GRADE A A GAME??????? Interviewers love to be asked questions, so feel them out as well!</p><p>Finally … Just focus on your strengths!! I’m sure you have some, anon!!! All of my fans do!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong> Can you please take a video of you saying "trans rights"?!</strong>
</p><p>I think I did this right?????? Maybe!!!!! Either way I obviously say TRANS RIGHT!!!! Trans folks are great!!!! I myself have personally appreciated a few here and there!!!!!</p><p>
  <a href="https://va.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_qjyzk6B46X1r4zr83_720.mp4">https://gabriel.archer.co/hosted_video_001/transrites.mp4</a>
</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Eric are you single? 😘</strong>
</p><p><strong>Eric</strong>!!!! My boy!!!! Another one for you!!!!!</p><p>msg:fwd garcher@fta.com turnover turn.down replaceable.eric@fta.int.org stage=hidden space?new sheen/prodigal/michael.exe</p><p>&gt; not ur boy</p><p>&gt; but as it happens</p><p>&gt; i am single and so ready to get the fuck out of here </p><p>&gt;if u r in la and can pick me up from this hellhole ill buy u a burger</p><p>&gt; sry aunt michael but im an unpaid intern and i need 2 get laid</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Eric so when are you available for the ass kicking tho</strong>
</p><p>ERIC!!!!! You’re so POPULAR!!!!!</p><p>msg:fwd garcher@fta.com turnover turn.down replaceable.eric@fta.int.org stage=hidden space?new sheen/prodigal/michael.exe</p><p>&gt; uh like i said any time bro</p><p>&gt;or maam</p><p>&gt; or sir</p><p>&gt; i use dude as gender neutral sry</p><p>&gt; but yeah any time im ready to bail on this fkn place </p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong> Eric, check ur dms. Denny's parking lot aquired. Will fite but only if u promise to go for coffee after... preferably not at denny's tho... (have also sent a muggshotte:tm: ;-) so u know who it is~~)</strong>
</p><p>[just hacked into the asks sry - eric]</p><p>&gt; so yall im bailin on this shitttt</p><p>&gt; gon get dennys and laid</p><p>&gt; auntie mike is takin gabr to a bar to answr the rest on his mobile</p><p>&gt; so</p><p>&gt; rename this ask drunk gabe anything plz</p><p>&gt; ill see if i can get aunt mike to post some stuff ive got dirt on her from last easter she dont </p><p>want no one seein</p><p>&gt; this has been fun yall bless</p><p>&gt; peace out - eric</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
dandelionofthanatos asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>GABRIEL, SIR, have you ever seen the Laddergoat video!? Also, do you like creme brulee!</strong>
</p><p>I have NOT!!! Oh, Internet Anonymous People, please send me fun things!!!! I would look it up but my helper for the evening has apparently had a “family emergency” and has left me! I have changed locales and am on my VERY FANCY MOBILE DEVICE now!!</p><p>I actually like creme brulee a LOT!! It’s usually a small dessert - my stomach doesn’t have that much room for sweets after a good piece of steamed salmon!!!! - and I LOVE that satisfying crunch when you break the part on the top. I don’t know what you call it, hahaha – I’m not a food blogger, I’m just their boss!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Sorry. I meant "stay fit" during quarantine. But I loved all of your advice!!!</strong>
</p><p>I’m SORRY ANON!!!!! I have SO much advice on that – did I misread your ask?? OH WELL, here’s a SECOND CHANCE to deliver what I’ve got!!!</p><p>FIRST step is to put your workout at top priority: do it as early in the day as you can!! Use ALL of your energy to get it IN and get it DONE. Do that early morning run!!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!</p><p>NEXT, be sure to focus on your INNER HEALTH as well. DON’T let quarantine turn your diet upside down!! Make SURE you keep up on all of your nutrients!! With all that extra time at home, it’s time to get COOKING!!! It’s easy to pre-order your groceries so that you have as much CHICKEN and GREENS as you need!! Fill yourself up with GOODNESS so that you can DELIVER goodness!!!!</p><p>SECOND, despite what I am doing in the background RIGHT NOW!!!!!!, don’t soak up your depression with alcohol or sugar! Keep those unhealthy guys OUT of your MOUTH!!!!! </p><p>and REMEMBER that ANYTHING can be a workout if you DO IT HARD ENOUGH!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, we've seen A.Z. Fell's excellent wine blog. What are your own favorite alcoholic beverages?</strong>
</p><p>FUNNY you should ASK!!!!! Because I am right now out at a SPLENDID little bar with the one and only Michael Rosa!!! And we are drinking VODKA TONICS which are AMAZING RIGHT NOW. Mine has diet tonic, though. Michael has said that she would prefer to be shot than drink diet tonic, but I can’t taste the difference!!!! There is a LEMON TWIST in mine that’s just FANTASTIC. It’s really cheering me UP!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, my dude, my man, BRO!!!! Any pets???</strong>
</p><p>BRO!!! HELLO BROOOO!!!!!! I assume this is a different bro than A Bro? Maybe???? I think? I can have more than one bro, right??? Michael is now laughing at me. Is Michael a bro????? I don’t know whether she’s still approving these answers or not!!!!</p><p>PETS!! I LOVE PETS!!!! Alas, I do not HAVE a pet because my WHIRLWIND LIFESTYLE and CRAZY HOURS would make it unfair for me to have a dog or cat or something that would depend on my being around !!!! I do SO want to get a dog someday. It’s like a workout buddy with paws!!!! What’s better???????</p><p>We did have DOGS growing up!!!!! They were all named Toby</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel!!!! Can you ask Eric how his INNER HEALTH is????!!??!?!?</strong>
</p><p>i would LIKE to but Eric had a FAMILYEMERGENCY so I am assuming his INNER HEALTH is not as CALM and SERENE as he might like!!!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, your answers have been the highlight of my day. How do you have so much energy? Do you ever get tired? And what do you do to reenergize?</strong>
</p><p>I have so much energy because I just LOVE life!!! Don’t you!!!! </p><p>I do, in fact, get tired! Some days having this much energy all day can leave me with VERY LITTLE at home!!! Those days I just microwave a chicken breast with some ketchup and go to bed!! I ALSO can get worn down when I get or have to deliver some REALLY bad news in the workplace! I prefer when everything is going just SWELL!!!!!</p><p>If I have to reenergize, first I have a HEALTHY SNACK to BALANCE MY INNER STRENGTH, like seven peanuts or six cashews. Then I make sure to drink a FULL 16 ounces of water!!! If neither of those work, I’ll do a quick 5K run somewhere!!! Usually those ENDORPHINS kick in my then and I’m BACK ON TRACK. </p><p>If that doesn’t work, I … . .. well I find something else!!!! TO energize with!!! Life isn’t worth living if you aren’t at your PEAK A GAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p>
<hr/><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong> HEY ITS ME, YA BRO AGAIN!! I'm yelling through the door that my sister is still trying to break down!!! It's so much fun! Sibling bonding hahahah! She gets up early to go to the gym so she can play Eye of the Tiger at sunrise as she beats up a sandbag!! She likes coffee black and sweet! CREAM IS FOR THE WEAK and she yelled that anyone who eats salad without dressing is weak, their line is weak, and they won't survive the winter!! ahaha she sounds like my dad lol</strong>
</p><p>BROOOOOOO!!! Is this the original A BROOOO or a NEW BROOOO or the OTHER BROOOOO?????? You are talking about your sister so i THINK its the SISTER BRO???? am i getting a DATE!?!??!?</p><p>Are you KIDDING/??? Eye Of The Tiger is my third favorite song, outside of CLIMB EVERY MOUNTAIN and a secret song i shant name!!!!! I would hold that sandbag for her and if she accidentally punched me THAT WOULD BE OKAY because I’m just about GIVING PEOPLE WHAT THEY NEED???</p><p>Cream is in FACT for the WEAK and the SAD but also????? Salad without dressing is a TEST!!! It is a TEST of your NATURE and COMMITMENT!!! Focus on that FRESH crunch of the ICEBERG LETTUCE???!!!!!! taste the mild hit of a CARROT!!!!!!! spend ample time ENJOYING that single SLICE of GREEN PEPPER. Don’t use a dressing to hide this <strong>NATURAL ABUNDANCE</strong>!!!! </p><p>I would ENJOY having a conversation with her about THIS ISSUE!!!!! How may I CONTACT MY NEW DARLING!!!!!!</p><p>[please note - G.A. Archer is drunk - M]</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
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  <strong> What's your drink for tonight king</strong>
</p><p>so i WAS drinking vodka and diet tonic BUTTTTTTTT I have SWITCHED OVER to this delightful new creation called a WHISKEY SOUR???????? I have never HAD this concoction before!!! But it’s AMAZING????? </p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel, how can someone who is so concerned about inner values and health live in a town like L.A. that is so internally and externally corrosive? Don't you think you'd be better suited in a more rural surrounding?</strong>
</p><p>Okay, SO! YES, LA has some pollution like you WOULDN’T BELIEVE!!!! But the thing about my job is that I am always TRAVELLING to new places, to meet new people, and that gives me PLENTY of fresh air to work with!!!!!</p><p>PLUS the FTA building in LA is a leader in solar energy, new filtration methods, and we use a GREAT NUMBER of air-purifying plants to help clear the air! I have a rubber plant in my office and it’s SO GOOD at removing toxins!!!! I come home feeling tired but refreshed EVERY TIME!!!!!!</p><p>And I’m really not sure what you mean about - internally corrosive????? Look, people in LA do HARD BUSINESS, but you don’t come to this city unless you’re prepared to do HARD BUSINESS here in the City of Angels !!!!?? Like!!!! We play hard games with each other!!! That’s cause HARD GAMES are on the horizon!!!! But most of the players just want to HELP the people around them so that isn’t quite toxic???? I don’t think!!! Maybe I shall order another drink and talk to Michael about this!!!!!!</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
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  <strong>heyyo gabe my man. do you know what a 'wap' is?</strong>
</p><p>MY BRO MY FRIEND!!!!!</p><p>I absoLUTELY had to look this up!!! I was so very concerned!!!!</p><p>The first search entry led me to a music video that I didn’t think was APPROPRIATE with a COWORKER nearby???? SO I kept going.</p><p>Then I discovered it might refer to a rapper, a number of American companies, a GOOD number of  political organizations, a few very special technological advances, and then was drawn back to the original definition. This was VERY CONFUSING????</p><p>But assuming you meant this as the original definition - which I will NOT BE POSTING HERE THANKS!!!!! - while I had NO IDEA what the abbreviation meant, I do have to admit that the CONCEPT is not a NEW THING TO ME?????</p><p>That’s all I can say right now!!!! Because Michael is laughing and choking right next to me and I need to KNOW they are OKAY?????????</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
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  <strong>Gabriel!!!!!!!!! Any plans for the night besides drinking????????</strong>
</p><p>im sorY my friend but!!!!!! Tonight’s plans have been mostly about the drinking!!!!!!! My BRO MIchael ROsA has been FRIENDLY ENOUGH to heLp me through this and!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!D I’m just trying to FOCUS on your QUESTIONS!!!!!!!</p><p><br/>
Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>Hello friends!!!!!!! It turns out I am here AGAIN to answer your questions!! Today will be my LAST DAY with you, SADLY, as I am just FAR too busy for this to continue with no end in sight! Ha Ha Ha!!! I have to get back to the grindstone!!!! FTA Content doesn’t run itself!!!! So please, ENJOY ME for the next few hours, and thanks AGAIN for being SO MUCH FUN!!!!!</p><p>[i cant wait for thsi to end - eric]</p>
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  <strong>hey gabe, hows your head this morning after a night out!</strong>
</p><p>Thank you for asking!!!!! It hurts terribly!!!! I just get so EXCITED when I’m drinking!!!! I get carried away, ha ha ha. Never Fear Though!!!! I won’t let something as puny as a giant hangover defeat <strong>me</strong>!!!!!  I’m combining the powers of CAFFIENE! HYDRATION! IBUPROFIN! INTERMITTENT FASTING! and POSITIVE THINKING to restore my inner equilibrium!!!!</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
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  <strong>Mr. Archer, how do you celebrate christmas? Any recommendations for healthy christmas recipes?</strong>
</p><p>I’m not really close to my family any more and I’m usually sooooooo busy around the holidays!!!! Christmas is a BIG TIME for FTA!!! We have to make sure our TV stars, YouTubers, bloggers, and authors are all putting out holiday content and then we have to SELL IT to our FANS!!!! It’s CHAOS!!!!!!!</p><p>But on Christmas Day I DO treat myself to a little special something!!! I make a FANCY CHICKEN in the oven – the WHOLE chicken!!!! I roast that up with some brussels sprouts and then sit down in my dining room where I put up my tiny tree (of COURSE I have a tree!!!! they’re so beautiful!!!!) and enjoy it with a bottle of wine. </p><p>For healthy Christmas recipes, please check out these blogs:</p><p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gDirubjWFk4">Simple Farm Living</a> by Rosa Farrell</p><p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfvEgWINUFc">Ethical Birdfarmer</a> by Lee Titt</p><p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx83KIH5Gv0">Every Day Is A Holiday!</a> by M.G.G.</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong> Hey... hun you alright there? You doin' ok? Like for real tho. Have you thought about getting an ESA dog? Maybe a golden you can take on runs with you? Even if you're whirlwind, you could still bring an ESA with you to work most places and hey!! Having an office dog is *great* for office morale! Plus, you're the boss right? ESA RIGHTS!!!</strong>
</p><p>All you anons probably know by now that I DO want a DOG!! VERY MUCH!!!! I just don’t know if I have the time to really dedicate to having one!! You have to WALK a dog! And feed it!!! And play with it and train it to do REALLY COOL tricks!!!! adn hold it when it wants to snuggle!!!! And <strong>PET IT A LOT</strong>!!!!! These are all things that you o with <strong>dogs</strong>!!!!! </p><p>Also, anon, did you mean to type ESA so much???? I don’t need an Emotional Support Animal!!!!!!! All of my emotions are SUPPORTED by my CHEST!!!! And my POSITIVE ATTITUDE on days I am not <em>INCREDIBLY HUNGOVER</em>!!!!! </p><p>[typos left alone - eric]</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
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  <strong>Hey Gabriel! Please, say Hi to Michael for me!!! You two seem like, such a great team. What's the best part of working with Michael?</strong>
</p><p>MICHAEL!!!! DUUUUDE!!!! </p><p>Michael is normally my bro, and she confirmed that last night, EXCEPT for TODAY because my HEAD IS POUNDING!!!!!!! and she is just LAUGHING at my FACE!!!! Is there something on my face. I n3ed to go check</p><p>[he litraly did - eric]</p><p>Anyway Michael is SO FABULOUS at her job!!! Sometimes I get OVEREXCITED and RUN MY MOUTH A LOT, or I sign up for too many projects!, or do something silly and extravagant, and she ALWAYS manages to reel me in and sit me down. Like a dog!! Ha ha ha. Full Clown Energy today!!!! I am so funny!!!</p><p>Michael’s incredibly precise and very, very calm. I think we balance each other REAL WELL!!!!! Unless we are DRINKING???????</p><p>[good work auntie mike - eric]</p><p>[you’re welcome - m]</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hello Mr. Gabriel. What's your favourite way to relax?</strong>
</p><p>Anon, this one stumped me for a while??? I don’t spend very much time relaxing, ha ha ha!!!  BUT!!! Rest days are VERY important for your body!!! So I do take some time occasionally to do OTHER THINGS!!!!</p><p>I enjoy RUNNING a lot!!! Running anything under 10 miles is VERY RELAXING. I come home feeling GREAT and fall RIGHT to sleep!!! </p><p>I also enjoy reading some of our blogs at night! I know, I know, that’s work, right???? But we have so many GREAT writers and I can always find something that makes me happy to read!!!</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hey Gabriel. What are your hobbies?</strong>
</p><p>HOBBIES! Can I say working???? Michael says no. She is also still laughing at me. I have applied MORE COFFEE and MORE IBUPROFEEN to the problem and she has offered me a DONUT. Should I take it, anon???????</p><p>I really DO enjoy working though!! I wouldn’t work so much if it wasn’t so satifying to watch the numnbers roll in!!!! I really need that COFFEE to KICK IN ANY TIME.</p><p>Coffee. Is that a hobby!!!!</p><p>I also, obviously, enjoy running, biking, swimming, and working out ALL MY PARTS at the gym! </p><p>I Oh!!! I DO enjoy a quick game of SPIDER SOLITAIRE on my laptop!!!!!</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Gabriel!!!! My man! I know you've already talked about your music tastes a bit, but what is the secret song exactly? Why is it a secret???</strong>
</p><p>What secret song!!!!! I have no secrets!!!!!!!  </p><p>[i sent him last nights post - eric]</p><p>OH! No, I’m sorry, I fear my staff will MOCK ME terribly for my second favorite song. I shant give that information out friends. I SHAN’T!!!!!!!! </p><p>Unless you can cure a hangover.</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
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  <strong>Gabriel!! Yes, you should take the donut! Treat YOSELF!!!!!!!!</strong>
</p><p>you know WHAT, ANON?????</p><p>I TOOK TWO.</p><p>[he actlly did homies. fkn bear claw. never seen him eat anything like it - eric]</p>
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holdingonforheaven asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hi, Gabriel! As an HR professional, I'm really curious as to how your last performance review went. Did you do a 360 review to get feedback from your direct reports? What did they say? Where do you think your areas of growth might be? Also, just so you know, I am documenting this conversation and I will ask you to sign the transcript of what we said. Just for ~legal reasons~ *Alexis Rose smirk*</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>[this response got delayed in the system idk man  ask box is closed plz dont send anymore i just work here - eric]</em>
</p><p>A 360 review??? How antiquated!!! No, here at FTA we do PEER REVIEWS and then get performance reviews from our BOSSES! It’s the boss that determines your salary and the projects you’re assigned, right????? That’s just how it works here!!!! </p><p>My last performance review went SUPER WELL!!!!! As a Director I of course report to the Board of Executives, who only had EXCELLENT things to say about me!!!! They said my work output was <strong>ENORMOUS</strong>!!!! and that they appreciated my ENTHUSIASM!! They also said I was <strong>RELENTLESS </strong>and occasionally <strong>TOO PUSHY</strong>, which is <em><strong>GREAT </strong></em>to hear because I am trying to get my POSITIVE MESSAGES across to all my employees and sometimes you have to stay DETERMINED to do so!!!! </p><p>I don’t understand why this ask feels THREATENING!!!! I assure you I am doing a GREAT job!!!</p><p>[This note was not submitted by FTA Legal and therefore is subject to the FTA policies regarding social media outreach. With questions please contact Raphaelle McRodd - Legal]</p><p>[Please note that Gabriel’s comments do not legally represent the views or internal methods of FTA. also, brb finding a nice 360 - m]</p><p>[aunt mikey is lookig to transfer ino hr i hope that means shell hire me im  broke - eric]</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Don't you go on runs every day? And if you could take a dog to work, that'd solve all those other problems, since you could go on another break at lunch and (speaking from experience) everyone else in office is happier when there's an office dog, so i bet they'd even pet and snuggle when you're too busy with meetings!! (please get urself a dog, everyone deserves an animal if they'll love it so obviously as you do)</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>[this response got delayed in the system idk man  ask box is closed plz dont send anymore i just work here - eric]</em>
</p><p>Wow, the readers just REALLY want me to have a dog!! Let me guess – you all just want to see pictures of my ATTRACTIVE FACE next to a CUTE PUPPY?????? I can’t BLAME you though! Look at this amazing dog I got to play with once::</p>
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</div><p>Anyway!!! With all of this talk I have to admit I am starting to consider thinking about maybe the concept of perhaps possibly analyzing the pros and cons to ponder the potential consideration of I guess perhaps conceivably maybe a dog?????</p><p>MAYBE.</p>
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Anonymous asked:<br/>
</p><p>
  <strong>Hey... this is "A Bro"s sister... If you're still interested in coffee-no-cream meet me at Fourth Wall Cafe off Hollywood Blvd. 1 hour.</strong>
</p><p>
  <em>[yeah this alreayd happened its three days old and makes me want to die how the f did this man get a date out of tis nonsense? - eric]</em>
</p><p>
  <em>[then again i got dennys and laid - eric]</em>
</p><p>
  <em>[sweet date by the way, a fight, food, adn a fuck, call me anytime sweaty - eric]</em>
</p><p>Oh, well. Um! Ahem.</p><p>Michael, cancel my meetings.</p><p>[i am not your secretary - m]</p>
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